Friday, December 12, 2014

I'm back from the dead! But I'm still dead!

Hello, world. I'm posting this blog post after exams, so this post is not really an entry for the course SLOGs.... it's more like a Dear Diary entry where I pour out the contents of my aching heart. A soliloquy of my despair.

I'm currently in a state of panic. I went into the exam feeling fairly confident. I mean, I was able to answer all of the questions from the 2010/2013 exams, how bad could it possibly be? As long as I got  over 40%, I'd still end up with a mark in the 70s. I prepared so much for it. My cheat sheet was crammed full of all of the possible questions from the assignments, tests, and lecture notes.

*echoing* Prepared so much for it. Prepared so much for it. Prepared so much for it *echoing*

On a scale of 1-10, I bombed that exam with a 100. I don't think I could have possibly messed up more than I did on that exam, besides like.... not showing up for the exam at all. All of the questions I thought would be on the exam, all of the questions that I prepared for.... were not on the exam. No halt (!!) , no generic big-Oh, no conversion of statements (Not all, Any). Nope. Nope. Nope.

 I pretty much threw a course worth of achievements (I was so, so proud of my grade in the course... a mark in the high 90s) into a pile of feces.

 I was expecting delta-epsilons to be on the exam, but I wasn't expecting TWO such questions to be on the exam. And they weren't ones I was familiar with. As soon as I saw the two, my mind went blank. Then I realized I couldn't solve both. I entered this state of complete and utter panic. I started sweating. My mind went blank. I'm actually fairly certain I was shaking at one point.

All of the questions I successfully answered, I somehow managed to misread the questions, and actually answer the wrong question. You're not reading that wrong. All of the questions that I SHOULD have gotten right, I somehow managed to  prove something... that didn't even answer the question they asked. So I bombed the exam. Thoroughly.

 How does one do this? How does one throw away a semester's worth of efforts in the matter of 3 hours. I failed that exam, without a matter of a doubt. We will be receiving our marks before Christmas, but I already know the result.

I went into the exam with high 90s, and now I'm not going to meet the minimum requirement for passing the course. I am going to have to repeat this course. I don't think words exist to describe how sad I am right now.

What is life.


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